For too long I've been depending on other people to do the work for me and somewhere in between my childhood and young adolescence... I lost myself.
For a while I've been wishing and praying and hoping that I could escape the confides of my room in my home.
But I always made an excuse to stop and lay back down in my bed and mope about my poorly made decisions.
And as I slowly descend into a depression--- I'm lashing out.
I'm daydreaming more and more again
I can't even tell the difference between reality and imagination anymore
I just can't stop making movies in my head
After so long-- I'm going crazy because my family is making me go crazy.
They always use the Guilt-Trip
"You don't pay for shit!!"
"Pay the rent!"
"I'm not giving you anymore money!"
All of them are true and that's what hurts most--- because I don't want them to be true. But I can't help it.
In their eyes, I am a monster
They're just too modest to say so
And when I get enough money, when I gain enough courage, when I'm home alone... I'm getting out of there.
I'm running away